GLEE: Goodbye

It’s time for the season finale of the show, but that very bad reminder of the Pilot from the show made me want to go find a very large bottle of vodka. Too late, as we have to listen to songs about saying goodbye. “Forever Young”, at least the Rod Stewart version is so very much something Will would sing to the students. I suppose I should be grateful he didn’t choose the Alphaville version would imply that they should die young. Small favors?

Kurt’s voiceover might just point out everything that has been wrong with some of his storylines. Coming out of the closet and inspiring others is laudable, but I don’t know if that’s how one should remember high school (not that social justice is bad, let me get that clear.) Burt Hummel, you are a mensch! Dancing to “Single Ladies” with Brittany and Tina is just so precious and adorable! Why does this really feel like it’s a series finale? I don’t really need these flashbacks right now?

No one should want their lives to end up like The Notebook, because that movie might be the most depressing thing in the history of all love stories. That’s just a bad aspirational goal for anyone.

“Say Goodbye” is a very apt choice, Kurt. It’s a great song, and one that I’m shocked hadn’t been around before. Then again, I don’t think it fit back in the Madonna episode well at all.

Glee, please do a better job of researching how college applications work? EVERYONE should have known where they were going back in April, not you know, MAY!

Good for you Mercedes! Getting in as a background singer is better than nothing.

Mike’s going to Chicago and not New York now. That’s a little sad.

Oh my Santana! You had a mullett in your youth, but your mom is Gloria Estefan, so I don’t really care. College should be where you get stuff done.

Brittany, how do you have a 0.00 GPA? That’s not really possible? Also, no school should let you stay for a second senior year.

“You Get What You Give” is one of those anthems that should be about graduating, but how in the hell is Artie not graduating? This is all very confusing show. I also don’t care if Brittany isn’t graduating, she’s still a Senior and should be singing with the rest of them. (Also, such a horrible radio edit there show!)

Wedding plans? I could not care less right now. This is just that storyline that never ends. I think there’s settling on both sides, no questions asked.

James Lipton, you’re too good for Glee. Why are you even there? Finn, I think this internal monologue is just about one of the first.

Will, it’s taken you this long to tell Finn why he’s in Glee. GOOD LORD, HOW ARE YOU STILL A GOOD TEACHER? One that just got Teacher of the Year?

Finn, is it really possible to fix your dad’s dishonorable discharge? I don’t even know.

Dedicating “All My Life” is Finn seems like a horrible idea. It’s also making me have flashbacks to my time in Junior High choir when I sang this song because I’m one of those girls who should sing male parts. But now I look at that song and I just want to scream. Oy, not a good arrangement, despite the tears.

Quinn, are you really sure that McKinley has given you some gifts? You got pregnant and nearly died in four years; I don’t think that’s a good set of goals. Quinn buying a MetroNorth pass is a really sweet gift for Rachel.

Puck getting that kiss from Quinn is now going to save him? Okay now…

I still don’t understand this Sue vs Roz showdown. Not that it really matters, because it’s just another excuse to see Sue being mean to someone. Roz wants to get rid of Figgins now? For what reason? The Peter Principle should keep him there forever.

Quinn gets to keep her uniform and now Sue’s about to impart some grand words of wisdom. Sue, you might not be as horrible a teacher and coach as you think you are.

A C- is enough for Puck. I’m not shocked at all.

What is his graduation ceremony? There are more people between Mike and Quinn. Also, a musical number during the procession. I’m not even sure this makes sense in ANY world. Where’s alphabetical order too? I work too closely to education for this not to drive me insane right now.

Now, we’ve got our big moment, do all of our found family (Finn, Kurt and Rachel) get to be in NYC together? Finn’s not going. Kurt’s not going. What the hell? Somehow, Rachel does, though. Because the world needs to be perfect for her. I find that nearly impossible to believe under the best of this show’s logic.

Rachel’s managed to get everything she’s wanted in life, only now she’s deferring the acceptable to help Finn and Kurt get to New York too.

Santana’s mom, you’re awesome! Money to go to college, you should keep it. If you’re not going to college, take it to New York and follow that dream you’ve had since you were little.

Finn, what are you doing? I don’t think this is the type of surprise to give your fiancee right before you’re supposed to be married. Okay, so instead of getting married, Rachel’s getting dumped. Oh and Finn’s joining the army. This is all the wrong level of contrived drama, even for this show. But, as she’s the star of the show, she’ll get her dream, despite getting some others crushed in the process.