THIS IS US: Career Days and Mid-Life Crises

This week’s episode of This Is Us explored how work relates to our identities, both how we see ourselves and how others see us.

Let’s start with Randall: he’s the only one who followed in his father’s footsteps What do you think about his journey toward “standing out”? How do you think it impacted his familial relationships?

Ange: I wanted to hug young Randall when he was telling Jack that he doesn’t want to stand out and that he was dumbing himself down because he didn’t want to get ice cream for his good grades if Kate and Kevin weren’t. From what we’ve seen with the past and present so far, Randall seemed/seems to have a good relationship with both of his parents, or at least better ones than his other two siblings. Whether or not Randall following in his father’s footsteps has something to do with that, I don’t know. I do like his line at the end and how it was contrasted throughout the ep that while he may have followed in his father’s footsteps, his career is something that genuinely enjoys whereas Jack went down that path so he could provide more for his family, so in that sense I feel like Randall has consciously chosen to stand out from his father.

Leah: Poor little Randall. Wanting to fit in with your family, your school, etc. can be so hard. Grown Randall’s ability to find a job that pays the bills AND is something he is good at/likes is great. He seems to have mastered (minus this mini midlife crisis) a balance between being humble and brilliant. I would like to think that is due in part to good parenting by Jack and Rebecca who really tried in the end to do the best thing for Randall.

Melissa: I also ached for little Randall not wanting to be different from his siblings. I appreciated how this episode gave Jack the opportunity to open the conversation about Randall’s adoption with him while also strengthening that father-son bond. Grown up Randall is exceptional, but he is also a loving husband and father, obviously modeled after Jack. He’s the product of loving parents, even if they struggled some times to do what’s best for him.

I also wanted to highlight Yvette – the black mom who is the go-to for wisdom about Jack. She is a smart mom with good advice, but she’s also not afraid to call Jack and Rebecca on the fact they’re using her as a surrogate for black culture. I appreciate that the show is making that distinction.

Kevin struggled to perform at his job, finally accessing his emotions thanks to his co-star tricking him into crashing a funeral. How does what we learned about Kevin change your view of his character? Or does it change anything?

Ange: Oh Kevin, this is the second week in a row where you have made me tear up! The scene where he breaks down with the widow got to me. Justin Hartley is proving to be a bit of a secret weapon. If you had asked me after the first episode, I honestly wouldn’t have thought that Kevin would make me feel so much throughout the show. I like that we’re getting to see him open up a bit more and that he’s more than just a pretty face who wants to be taken more seriously. His experiences growing up have obviously affected who he is today and I’m interested to find out what his relationship was like with Jack as he got older and up to the point of Jack’s death. I’m also curious to find out what his relationship with Rebecca is like now that we know the mother/daughter relationship between Rebecca and Kate is currently strained.

Leah: I like Kevin, I do, but I struggle to care about him as much as I care about the others. Does this have something to do with the fact that I am overweight and adopted, maybe. But compared to the other siblings issues Kevin seems to be dealing with things that just aren’t that big a deal. Now – the speeches the writers give him and the delivery are great and I am starting to come around to him. I’m not all that amused with his costar though. Crashing a funeral for any reason seems…wrong.

Melissa: I also struggle with caring about Kevin’s struggles. However, this is the second time we’ve seen how his relationship with his father impacts his performance – first in the pilot in that scene with Henry Winkler on “The Manny” and now when he needed to access grief. Something happened between them that’s sent Kevin down a very different path than Randall’s, and I’m finally starting to wonder about his backstory.

Kate got a new job, in part, because of her weight. What did you think about that exchange with her boss (Jami Gertz)? How about her interaction with young Gemma?

Ange: I was pleased to see that we were getting more of a storyline with Kate that didn’t involve her weight or Toby and she was able to spread her wings a bit and soar at this new job, so it was a bit disappointing that one of the factors as to why she was being hired was because of her weight. I get that it’s a constant factor in her life and the decisions that she makes but I want to see that she is more than that.

Leah: The revelation that she and Rebecca aren’t that close made me sad. I want them to all still be this big happy family, even if I know that is unrealistic.

I’m glad Kate kicked that child out of the car and stood up to her new boss. She’s only ever worked for her brother, this is a good step.

Melissa: The confession from Jami Gertz’s character about why she ultimately hired Kate was very uncomfortable and I don’t want to be OK with it, but I think that I am inasmuch as it again highlights how Kate’s weight is a constant factor in her life, as Ange noted. It also gave Kate the chance to stand up for herself and demand respect for her abilities and skills. There’s a lesson in there about first impressions and getting a foot in the door.

We finally found out what Jack does for a living and saw him give up a dream in favor of job security. Does that align with your view of Jack?

Ange: Yes and no. From the start, Jack has been very optimistic and idealistic and has had romantic ideas about things in life, so in that sense it was sad to see him put his dreams on hold (because I’m not completely ruling out him giving up on Big Three Homes). That being said, Jack is a family man who would do anything for his family even if it meant sacrificing his own needs.

Leah: The name of his hypothetical business – AHHHH! Jack has always come around to doing what is best for his family. I feel like even though it is giving up a dream the idea of his family being happy makes him happy.

Melissa: I’d pictured him in a blue collar, boots-on-the-ground kind of job, so this both does and doesn’t fit. He’s still involved in construction, just more on the administrative side of it. I agree that a job will always take a backseat to his family’s happiness, though. We saw Jack setting aside his dream (for now?) in favor of a promotion that will, presumably, pay for Randall’s private school. That’s definitely on point for Jack.

Favorite lines/scenes?

Ange: Well Kevin’s breakdown speech and Jack’s speech to young Randall both had me in tears. I also loved Kate taking a stand and kicking Gemma the brat out of the car and making her walk. You go, girl! Oh and Beth’s reactions to Randall’s performance during career day was very on point. (Side note, their kids are so precious!)

Leah: I love Randall and his wife together. Whenever they are doing their back and forth I am amused.

Melissa: Pretty much everything involving Randall – both as a child and as a grown up – lands on my favorite list this week. The little gesture with the tie as kid Randall walked into school was adorable. Grown up Randall announcing that he loves his job AND he’s taking piano lessons, that was amazing.

“That’s a mid-life crisis. A little one.” – Beth