NEW GIRL Recap: Halloween

Halloween costumes, David Walton…Oh how I love New Girl.

Nick is freaking out, his Freshman Year crush (Amelia) is coming into town and she is going to stay with them for a few days. He’s so freaked out he bought a new shirt. Of course it is a black t-shirt that looks like all his other clothes but it’s the thought that counts.
Jess is doing some seasonal work at a haunted house. According to Schmidt she looks like a zombie Woody Allen. He does a pretty good Woody Allen impression. Winston says he has nothing to add to that conversation although by the time it is over he has done a Marx Brothers impression.
I should mention that this conversation includes Jess saying she is going to use Sam’s body like a moisturizer packet. I’m not sure exactly what that entails but I’m down for anything involving Sam (David Walton).

Jess meets up with Sam the next day; he forgot his wallet on their last trip to, “No Pants City”. Sam is a doctor, a pediatric doctor to be exact. I was going to guess construction worker or maybe starving artist…not an actual doctor. That smile on Jess’s face is exactly why he doesn’t tell women what he does. They start to think he is a really great caring guy. More smiles as he does a cute little hand shake thing with a small child, he even does a fun voice. Jess insists she doesn’t feel anything for him, but she can’t stop smiling.

Schmidt is giving Winston relationship advice, oddly though what he says makes a little sense. If Shelby and Winston aren’t having sex then she isn’t his girlfriend she is just a friend he buys meals for. Sure it’s Schmidt advice but it’s not entirely wrong. Somehow Schmidt brings this around to Cece. He is sure she is still very much into him.

His next bit of “knowledge” makes less sense.
Winston: You’re going as Young Abe Lincoln for Halloween?
Schmidt: Statistically speaking every American thinks about Abraham Lincoln at least once a day, and Cece is American. So…

Nick and Amelia are getting back to the loft. They are reminiscing about how Nick used to pretend he was a guy who came out of a coma thinking he invented pie. It’s conversations like this that make me think maybe I didn’t miss out on too much by not going to college. Amelia seems genuinely impressed.
Oh and I mean impressed like after a brief laugh that was way too boisterous for what Nick said she leaned in and kissed him.

Over in her room Jess is sewing and telling Cece that Sam is a doctor. Cece had him pegged as a tennis pro or an unemployed handsome guy, I can see that. Unfortunately the fact that he cares for people, especially children is making Jess like him. Even though she is denying it.
And what is Jess sewing you may have wondered? A Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtle costume for Cece’s boyfriend Robbie. Schmidt takes this opportunity to take some jabs at Robbie. Cece tells him to knock it off but Robbie seems generally unphased.

Amelia and Nick are in bed post some friendly getting to know one another. Nick’s Sexy Mix, or what I assume is part of his sexy mix is playing Sheryl Crows, “Strong Enough” in the background. Amelia goes in for another kiss, only this one is so awkward and uncomfortable I can barely look directly at it happening and amusingly enough this prompts my daughter to look at me and say, “I’m never dating anyone…ever.” Well I guess this show is good for something.
Nick is equally as turned off by Amelia’s mouth antics.

Later that night Jess and Nick meet in the hallway, their respective bedfellows are in their rooms. Jess is just starting to confide in Nick that she might actually like Sam when Amelia comes out. She clings to Nicks arm and starts making out with him right there in the hall in front of an uncomfortable Jess.
As Sam is leaving Jess invites him to her haunted house, it’s the last night and it would be fun. He makes hemming and hawing about not liking to dress up, but he says he will try to make it.
Jess tells Nick she thinks this is a test, if Sam shows up in costume he likes her, if not he doesn’t.

At the haunted house Winston is working his cop uniform while oddly enough Schmidt is quite a dashing young Abraham Lincoln. They see Shelby who is dressed in a tiara, princess gown and a cape that is covered in stuffed animal cats and dogs. She’s Reigning Cats and Dogs. It’s clever, really clever but she told Winston they should be something sexy for Halloween and this is not sexy.

Schmidt finds Cece and Robbie on the carousel. He makes a nuisance of himself while Jess and Nick are carving pumpkins. Jess is going to tell Sam she likes him tonight. Nick equates Haunted Houses to relationships.
Nick: You walk in all confident and then once you get in it isn’t what you thought it was going to be, it’s scary.
Amelia who is also there has carved a pumpkin of herself, Nick and their dog. Nick is scared.

Everyone who sees Cece (she is dressed as an Angel) and Schmidt think they are there together as a bride and groom. Robbie, as always seems unaffected by Schmidt. Robbie takes Schmidt for a walk. He comes out and tells Schmidt he knows Schmidt thinks he is dumb, but he isn’t going anywhere. Schmidt tries to head-butt Robbie twice; it doesn’t go well for Schmidt. Robbie blocks two more head-butt attempts by Schmidt before saying they need to call a truce.

Jess and Nick are still talking when they see Sam, he isn’t in costume but he does put on a big red clown nose. Jess takes that as he really likes her.
Outside the haunted house Nick is talking to Sam while Jess is working her shift. Sam is texting what turns out to be another girl, a weekend girl. Nick seems concerned but Sam says Jess doesn’t care; she wants a relationship less than he does. Seeing as Nick knows that Jess plans on telling Sam she likes him likes him tonight he takes a deep breath and heads towards the haunted house.
I don’t think I’ve mentioned this yet but Nick’s costume is the best of all. It is bumble bee antennas and a white t-shirt that says Arthur across it. He is Bea Arthur. I find it completely ingenious.

Robbie and Schmidt are bonding over a deep fried turkey dinner and caramel apples, ahhh fair food. Cece finds them and wonders what is going on but Robbie says it is okay, they are all going to hang out more together.

Poor Nick is in the haunted house screaming like a girl because he saw a clown, I don’t blame him but the high pitched scream is hilarious. On edge already Nick ends up punching Jess dead in the nose when she jumps out at him from behind a wall. He doesn’t have time to feel bad because the rest of the haunted house cast comes running out and attacks Nick. He keeps screaming “This is my nightmare!” as they are beating on him. Nick gets escorted out as Jess gets checked out by Sam, you know, because he is a doctor. He even has a lollipop in his pocket, and that isn’t a metaphor.
Jess takes his concern as more than it is and asks him out. He says he can’t, he was pretty clear about what he wanted and dating isn’t it. I’m sorry to say that is the last we will see of Sam.

Amelia finds Nick and asks how he feels about her. He comes clean about not being as into them as a couple as she is. Poor Nick gets slapped before she stomps off.

Schmidt walks up to Cece and Robbie; he thinks they should win best couples costume as bride and groom. He takes his Abe Lincoln costume off, shirt and all, hands everything but the vest over to Robbie and starts to walk away. He puts the vest on with his bikini like underwear. He even gets a cowboy hat from a passing kid. Schmidt is now Mathew Mcconaughey from Magic Mike, which is fantastic. Oh how I love Halloween episodes. He does some dance moves that should be restricted as Cece watches him with a smile.

In the parking lot Schmidt finds Winston, he is glad to hear Winston emancipated himself from a bad relationship. So no more Shelby and Winston either.

Back in the loft Jess is sitting on the couch next to Nick who is holding frozen food against her cheek. It’s a very sweet Nick/Jess moment. Seeing as I am a Nick/Jess ‘shipper I’m doing a little swooning.
The boys enter and Nick gets up, takes a swig of his beer and they hold his arms back so Jess can “make it right” by punching Nick back.

New Girl airs Tuesday 9/8c on Fox