NEW GIRL Recap: Going To The Chapel And We’re Gonna Get Married

The gang is at Cece’s wedding and Nick looks really nice in his suit. Apparently Schmidt gave him his worst suit, “Schmidt said if I could get it over my thighs he didn’t want it.” Jess tells Nick he looks really nice and then she leaves to find Cece while Nick joins the rest of the gang, along with Elizabeth, who is there as Schmidt’s plus one.

Jess is talking to Cece about how everything will be fine when Schmidt – looking for the bathroom – accidentally walks into the room. He and Cece stare at each other before Jess can shoo him out. Schmidt runs from the room to find Nick and Winston. He announces that Cece doesn’t want to get married. Nick and Winston want to know exactly what she said and Schmidt relays a very specific message, only Cece told him with his eyes. The boys shake their head and look at Schmidt like he is stupid. Jess comes out to chastise Schmidt and when he tells her the same thing she says, “Oh my God I thought you were talking about something real.” Jess assures Schmidt he is wrong, she is Cece’s best friend after all, and from this point forward he isn’t to look at or have eye conversations with Cece or so help her. The moment Jess leaves Schmidt says they have to sabotage this wedding. Winston is on board, of course, because he loves pranks.

Outside the wedding hall Shivrang is making his entrance on a white horse when Nick sees Schmidt looking shady. He approaches him and asks him one last time to call this off, please. Of course Schmidt does not and he has Winston blow an air horn causing the horse Shivrang is on to rear up and bolt for the road.

When Shivrang is back and seated at the front of the hall Jess finds Schmidt to let him know she is on to him. Moments later a very beautiful Cece enters to soothing Indian music only for the music to suddenly change to “Cotton Eyed Joe“. Everyone looks surprised except Jess who glares at a grinning Schmidt. Unfortunately for Nick he gets to the sound system only a second or two before Jess and she blames him of working with Winston and Schmidt. He of course denies it but it is his CD of “Cotton Eyed Joe” after all. Who has that on CD?? Jess goes on to call him childish, despite his assertion that he had nothing to do with it. Nick ends up getting upset by Jess’s failure to believe him and leaves Jess standing there. Schmidt and Winston are in the hallway discussing Phase Three when Nick finds them. He wants in.

The wedding is back underway when Schmidt finds Jess to say they may have gone too far, it is bad, like really bad. She follows Schmidt out into the hallway to find out what they did. Schmidt says it was all Winston’s idea, and since we know how Winston overdoes the pranks Jess looks genuinely scared. She threatened to mess up Schmidt hair if he doesn’t tell her right this minute what happened. Turns out Winston and Nick are in the air ducts with a badger. The badger is the school mascot of a school staying at the same hotel where the wedding is happening. We see Winston and Nick in the air ducts where Winston is telling Nick his plan is to drop the badger on the priest. Back in the hallway Jess is messing up Schmidt’s hair, she is not happy with him. Schmidt says it got too big when Nick got involved, something Jess makes him repeat. Schmidt says Nick told them not to do anything because it would upset Jess. Of course they didn’t listen. Jess calls Nick cell phone to apologize but Winston gets weird and starts talking about how they can track them with the phones and in the scuffle the badger gets out of the cage.

From downstairs you can hear Nick and Winston yelling at each other while trying to get away from the badger. Jess has had enough, she gets Schmidt to boost her up so she can get to Nick and Winston. When she finds Nick she apologizes but Nick says she can’t always expect him to be a mess and to mess things up. She says they can talk about it once they are out of the air ducts when Nick tells her the badger is loose. She freaks out while Winston announces this is where they will die.

When Jess calms down she gets moved around so she can face Nick. They are about to have a conversation regarding whether or not Jess agrees with her dad about Nick being a constant screw up when they hear the badger again. Downstairs Schmidt, who is now sitting in the wedding next to Elizabeth keeps looking up at the vents. A few moments later, Nick and Jess and the badger fall through a vent directly onto the wedding stage sending everyone running.

Jess gets up and addresses the crowd, her best people (Nick and Schmidt) are going to capture the badger so Cece and Shivrang can continue to get married. Cece tells Jess she doesn’t have to fix this, she can’t get married. She apologizes to everyone there but this isn’t what she wants. What she wants is to be with someone else. Cece looks at Schmidt who then looks at Elizabeth who is watching all of this go down. Shivrang announces that he wants to be with someone else too. He looks out at the crowd and tells everyone he wants to be with Elaine. He doesn’t care what his family says. Shivrang even wants to marry her in a Presbyterian Church, something that makes every Indian in that room gasp. Elaine stands up and it is Taylor Swift, she says she has been in love with Shivrang since the first grade. They run to each other and hug before he picks Elaine up and carriers her out of the room.

The wedding is clearing out leaving Nick and Jess in the room alone together. Jess asks if he is okay and he says sure, but concerning what they talked about earlier, he thinks they should just call it. It’s not like they were in love or anything, right? Jess looks at him with tears in her eyes and says okay, they can call it, that feels right. She is about ready to really cry though so she starts to walk away so he can’t see her face crumple.

Out in the hallway Elizabeth is mad at Schmidt for sabotaging Cece’s wedding, she doesn’t think he would do it if he didn’t want Cece back. Schmidt says it was just the gesture of a friend. Wouldn’t you know Cece walks up then and Elizabeth doesn’t waste anytime asking her if it was Schmidt Cece was talking about when she said she wanted to be with someone else. Cece looks at Schmidt and says yes. Elizabeth tells Schmidt he has to decide, right now. Elizabeth or Cece. I’m not sure I’ve ever seen Schmidt look more uncomfortable. He says he can’t decide and runs from the room.

Nick is at the bar getting a drink when Winston busts out of a vent to join him. Winston shows Nick the bite he got from the badger, he’s pretty woozy and he is probably going to bleed out soon, but Nick looks so sad he wants to know what happened. Nick tells Winston he and Jess decided to end it and she left. Now Nick is going to drink – a lot. Winston accuses Nick of being like his dad, when things get messy he runs away. There are other moves. Nick thanks him and runs after Jess.
He finds Jess outside waiting by her car. Before he can say anything she tells him she doesn’t want to give up on them, even if they aren’t sure what that is exactly. She wants to un-call it. Without saying a word he walks up to her and kisses her. He can be such a crazy person and then suddenly he can pull it together and be all kinds of sexy. She smiles and he takes the keys, helping her into the car before they drive off.

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