PSYCH Recap: Deez Nups

On the eve of Lassiter and Marlowe’s wedding, Chief Vick briefs the entire department on a mobster named Max Rizzo and his accountant Her Pollack. Pollack is said to have fled the organization with incriminating evidence against his boss, and Vick is determined her department will find him before his boss does. Lassiter can’t be distracted by business, even if he does find these developments exciting. He is only in the station to deliver his wedding invitations. He took the day off to arrange the whole thing.

Vick and Juliet are roped into participating in Marlowe’s bachelorette party, thrown by her former cellmate Big Wendy. Lassiter ignores Juliet mouthing “help us” in his direction, the ladies are going to attend this bachelorette party even if it kills them. And with Big Wendy driving the car, it just might.

After kissing his lady love goodbye and seeing her off for her bachelorette activities, Lassiter doesn’t make it back to his door before he is abducted. He had told Shawn and Gus he wasn’t having a bachelor party, and they couldn’t let that happen, even if they had to take him by force. They rented a party bus, and even flew in Lassiter’s supposed best friend Stumpy…whose absence he had blamed for the lack of a party in the first place. Gus’s girlfriend is in London, taking her son to see his father, so he’s free for the evening…except for all the phone calls and messages. Gus has separation anxieties.

The ladies arrive at a hotel suite where they get their party started with hooker dresses, alcohol shots, and male strippers. What could go wrong here? The ladies are drunk before they know it, but Juliet sobers up quickly when she realizes their stripper is McNabb.  He explains to Juliet that he and his wife are trying to save money for a new condo. He is afraid he will be fired from the police department now that his secret is out, but luckily for him Chief Vick seems to have passed out, and Juliet won’t rat him out.

The guys hit a casino, in the same hotel, and Lassiter is having a great time and cutting loose. His day gets even better when he happens to see the elusive mobster’s accountant, Pollack, and takes him into custody. Pollack convinces them to take him by his apartment to pick up the flash drives that contain the evidence.  Shawn snoops while Pollack retrieves the flash drives, he finds tickets to a Michael Damian concert and pockets them. They have to make a quick exit when Pollack encounters the mobster’s nephew in his apartment waiting for him.  The boys rush to their bus and flee the scene.

Marlowe is having second thoughts about marriage, and Juliet tries to give her a pep talk. Marlowe says she needs some air and steps out of the suite. When Juliet and the other girls go to look for her later, they can’t find her anywhere. Big Wendy is sure Marlowe wouldn’t have left the hotel or casino.

Max Rizzo phones Lassiter, and Lassie tells him he has his accountant then gloats that he’s going to prison. Rizzo shares that he has a friend of Lassie’s with him…Marlowe. Lassie reluctantly agrees to a swap, Marlowe is his only weakness in this world and that monster has her. Things take a bad turn when he learns that Pollack has escaped. Shawn has a plan, they go to the meeting with Henry posing as Pollack. They put a sack over his head so Rizzo won’t know. They make the swap as planned, and Marlowe also has a sack over her head….they soon learn it’s because it’s not really Marlowe. She had also escaped. Instead, they have a transvestite hooker that Lassie’s friend Stumpy had been hitting on at the casino. Lassiter and Rizzo call it even, and Lassiter is beaming with pride at hearing how kick-ass his fiancée was in making her escape.

The gang goes to the spot of Marlowe’s escape and try to figure out where she could be. She hasn’t contacted them, so what happened to her? Juliet is about to tell them about Marlowe’s cold feet regarding the marriage, but Shawn interrupts. He realizes that she probably didn’t go out the window as they thought, but down the trash chute and he feigns having a vision. They find Marlowe in the trash room, covered in some pretty nasty waste. She knew Lassiter would find her, and she’s thrilled to see him. The wedding is still on!

The guys all suit up for the wedding, except for Woody who misunderstood what they meant by “suit” and thought they were going for a swim. As they cross the casino to get to their bus, Shawn sees Michael Damian’s name on the marquee and realizes where Pollack’s hiding out. He feigns another “vision” and sure enough, Pollack and the bed post he took when he broke free in the lounge waiting for the show. Lassie apprehends him once again. As they board the bus, Rizzo’s nephew is watching and reporting to his uncle once again.

En route to the wedding, the guys have had about as much of Lassiter’s porn and hooker loving best man, Stumpy, as they can stand. Lassiter tells them he hasn’t even seen the guy since high school. His was just the first name that popped into his head when Shawn and Gus questioned him about the bachelor party. He doesn’t need other friends, Marlowe is the only friend he needs. The guys are relieved to learn Lassie wasn’t really close to that tool, Stumpy.  Seems having him for a friend is worse than having no friends at all.

When the preacher falls through, Pollack reveals he is a Justice of the Peace and he can officiate the ceremony. Lassie handcuffs him to a fence by the alter so he can’t get away. As soon as the bride starts down the aisle, the mobsters show up and a gunfight ensues. Luckily, the SBPD staff all carry their guns, even while attending weddings. Lassiter has his tucked inside his sock. They quickly shut down the insurgents and resume the wedding. Lassiter finally marries his soul mate, Marlowe, and he tosses the bouquet as she drives them away on her motorcycle.

At the reception, Juliet is cold and Shawn covers her up with his jacket. He leaves her for a moment to talk to Henry, who gives Shawn a pep talk about his future with Juliet.  He messed up with Shawn’s mother, he’d like to see Shawn break the cycle.  When Shawn returns to Juliet, something has changed. She found something in his pocket….the Michael Damian brochure he found with the tickets in Pollack’s apartment. He said he had a vision, but he already knew about Michael Damian before that. Juliet has finally seen what has been in front of her all the time, Shawn isn’t psychic, he just makes really good guesses. Shawn tries to explain himself, but can’t really come up with the words. Juliet feels like a fool. She throws her drink in his face then storms away leaving a brokenhearted Shawn standing alone and watching her go.

Psych airs Wednesdays at 10/9c on USA.