The episode starts off with Spencer and Hanna having a fashion crisis in Hanna’s bedroom. Well not really, but when Hanna put on the skirt she wore in her middle school of Mamma Mia, it sure felt like a crisis. Hanna put on the hideous aforementioned skirt, because it was floor length and usual miniskirts couldn’t hide the gapping wound left on her leg from the previous episode (why is it Emily and Hanna are always the ones to get seriously hurt?). Wren calls and Spencer’s spidey sense kick in when Hanna doesn’t answer the phone. Super sleuth Spencer questions why Hanna wouldn’t answer the call from “Downtown Grabby.” Oh, Spencer your twist on pop culture is cute. Hanna brushes it off, and we are reminded that she is staying away from Caleb to keep him safe from ‘A’.
While the girls are upstairs, Ted (whom I like to call “The Rev”) stops by with a thumb drive that was found in the back pew of the church. The drive has some videos of Hanna and her friends on it, and it doesn’t appear that they knew they were being filmed. Spencer and Hanna quickly realize those were the videos Ali was using to blackmail Jenna. They thought Ian had the drive, but clearly he did not.
Meanwhile at Ezra’s place Aria wakes the birthday boy with a little kiss, and we find out he spent the night worrying about his high school sweetheart and possible baby mama, Maggie. He wrote her an email, but never sent it. It becomes obvious that Ezra is not going to be able to enjoy whatever festivities Aria has planned for his birthday, because he is now obsessing over Maggie, and possibly ruining her life.
Outside of the coffee shop, Paily (Paige and Emily) are having one of those elephant in the room moments, where you try to discuss everything except for that monumental kiss between your girlfriend and her dead-ex-girlfriend’s cousin. Eventually, Emily just comes out and tells Paige, who is being extremely understanding and totally creepy at the same time. I don’t know what it is, but somehow when Paige was explaining away the kiss, it didn’t feel like she meant the words she was saying.
Spencer and Aria are at school (FINALLY! Seriously, I have no idea how these girls get up earlier enough to do all the stuff they do before school. Most teens I know, including myself at that age, rolled out just in time to make it to first period), where Spencer is telling Aria about the thumb drive. Aria is not really paying attention, because she is too busy plotting to disrupt an innocent woman’s life just so she can have happy times with her boyfriend. Spencer advises against Aria seeking out Maggie, but Aria pretty much tells Spencer to back off. The girls look up to notice the original Regina George herself, CeCe, talking to someone in the hallway. Spencer questions why CeCe would be back at high school, while Aria makes the more accurate statement of, “ She never left.”
Spencer talks to CeCe about a trunk show that Spencer agreed to do, but totally spaced on, when Emily and Paige come riding up in the background. CeCe wants to know what Emily is doing with “Pigskin,” then we are treated to flashback via Spencer’s mind, to explain the nickname. Turns out Ali and Paige have a past and it is not a pretty one. Ali tortured Paige, Paige fought back. Ali even went as far as writing a fake love letter to Paige that was supposed to be from Emily. We learned two main things from the Ali/Paige flashbacks. One, Paige has had it bad for Emily for a loooooonnnng time. Long before anyone seemed to realize that Paige even existed. Two, Ali was scared of Paige.
In the computer lab, Hanna is asking advice about the thumb drive as well as flirting with Caleb, via instant messenger. I don’t know about you, but I wouldn’t want to discuss sensitive information on my school’s network. Especially knowing that people in that school may be out to kill me. Jenna interrupts their flirt session, and Caleb gives her the stink eye.
School is over? Maybe? I don’t know. The Rosewood High schedule always has me so confused. Emily and Nate are in town and Nate is acting like he and Emily have made some sort of formal arrangement to go steady. The dude is making plans to go to Philadelphia and everything. He is so giddy, I was almost sad to see Emily shut him down. ALMOST. Emily makes it clear that the kiss was the kiss, but that doesn’t change her sexuality or the fact that she is dating Paige. Nate shows his cray cray side, getting super upset and basically calling Emily a tease or a slut. I’m not totally sure which one he was trying to get at here. Either way, Nate seriously needed to calm down.
Against all sound judgment, Aria goes to meet Maggie at her job, as a teacher, posing as Amy, an educational major undergrad. Was anyone else estatic to see Larisa Olenik, from The Secret World of Alex Mack? I don’t know why, but I seriously liked that show as a kid. Maybe it was all the moving of objects with her mind, and melting down into liquid goo.
Back at school Emily is headed to swim practice, but not before having a heated discussion with Spencer about Paige. Spencer is not calling Paige a snake but that wasn’t a “love dunk” she gave Emily last year before they got all comfy cozy.
Outside of school, Hanna confronts Jenna with the information about the thumb drive. Hanna is just trying to make sure that if the information on the drive happens to get out, Jenna knows that Hanna and the girls have nothing to do with it, so please don’t try to kill them. Jenna, in true Jenna form, isn’t making any promises.
Nate pulls up looking for Emily, but finds Hanna and an important lesson. “She’s gay!” Hanna had to remind Nate that despite whatever he thought may have been going on between him and Emily, Emily is indeed gay, and btw “She dated your cousin.” Never been a huge Nate fan, but his behavior this episode was beyond creepy, moving into scary possessive. Hanna spills the beans about Jenna faking being blind and Nate feels like that is an appropriate moment to show his cray cray again by yelling at Jenna. “I know you see me girl!” Ummm, yea…
Aria is sitting with Maggie in her classroom, trying to discern if Maggie’s life is indeed in shambles thanks to Ezra, when one of her students comes up and asks for a play date with another student. Why is this kid asking his teacher for a play date? The reason is this particular first grader is Maggie’s son Malcolm. Dun Dun Dun. That’s right Ezra Fitz potentially has a kid out there that he doesn’t know about. I don’t know why this seemed to have come as a shock to Aria. Everyone I spoke to about PLL assumed the kid was out there somewhere the moment Maggie was first mentioned.
In Emily’s room, Emily and Paige are studying when Emily decided to confront Paige about Ali. Paige basically lies and says she really didn’t know Ali. Oh, Paige. Don’t you know that in Rosewood, all liars eventually end up buried in the Hastings’ back yard? Paige seems to go with the idea of keep your friends close, and your enemies closer, and talks to Emily about possibly spending more time with her friends. In no way do I believe that Paige actually wants time with the rest of the PLLs, but more likely wants to keep an eye on them, so they don’t go spilling anymore of her secrets to Emily.
Back at Ezra’s place, Wes and Aria prepare for a birthday dinner for. Aria spills the beans about the baby and Wes acts like he is totally shocked to be an uncle. Ezra comes home looking a lot better than we last saw him. Turns out he spoke to Maggie and she is doing well, but made no mention of their love child. Aria and Wes exchange knowing looks, and you just know the stuff is going to hit the fan when Ezra eventually finds out that Wes has been plotting to steal his girlfriend all along. I mean, when he finds out that Aria and Wes have been keeping this secret from him. By the way I had to look up who Supertramp were. I know that was supposed to be some sort of generational joke, by jeez, Ezra isn’t that old. Supertramp formed in 1969! Aria and Wes decide not to tell Ezra about his little progeny, because it may have been part of the arrangement Maggie made with Ezra’s mom to keep the money flowing as long as Ezra was kept in the dark about his seed.
Getting ready for the trunk show, Spencer is changing when BAM out of nowhere a snake appears. It looks like a black python (desert cobra) to me and had me taking a moment to collect myself before continuing on with the scene. I have to give it to Troian Bellisario (Spencer) for acting that scene out because I would have completely lost it. CeCe finally shows up and saves Spencer by waking the snake with a blunt object, without hesitation. A person on my twitter feed said CeCe gave the dead snake to Aria to use as a belt. I like to believe this actually happened.
Spencer tells Hanna all about the snake, stating that she specifically said “snake” when talking about Paige earlier. Yup, Paige is now officially a member of the A-team in Spencer’s eyes. Hanna somehow believes Jenna and Noel are apart of this, and Spencer is like “Get off the blind girl train!” The phone rings causing, Spencer to lose her mind for a quick second reciting the alphabet backwards, but no stress Spence, Emily is just calling to say the knife that was in Maya’s bag has now mysteriously disappeared. Hanna thinks someone must have snuck in and stolen it. But Spencer says, “Why sneak in when you are invited?” YES, WE ARE LOOKING AT YOU PAIGE!
At the shoppe CeCe, Spencer, and Hanna are getting for the trunk show, when Emily arrives with Paige. Tense is not a strong enough word for the feeling in the room in that moment. Paige tries to play nice with Spencer saying, usually she likes to fly under the radar, but Emily has given her more confidence; she really wants to start fresh with Spencer. When they get the chance Hanna and Spencer send Paige off so they can snoop through her bag, thinking the missing knife would be in there. Unfortunately, they don’t move fast enough, and Emily catches them in the act. Emily is too through with her friends, and leaves in a huff with Paige. The girls didn’t find a knife, but they found something just as good; an earring Ali was buried with. Spencer is a little too excited to have proof that one of her best friend’s girlfriend likes to dig up graves for fun.
Out on the porch of Emily’s house, Paige admits to knowing Ali well enough to hate her. She hints at self-harm and thoughts of suicide due to Ali’s torment. As much as I don’t trust Paige, I had to feel for her in this scene. No one deserves to feel the way she did.
Over at Marin Manor, we find out where Hanna got her penchant for destroying electronics (remember the blender?). Mama Marin grinds up the thumb drive in the garbage disposal after discovering that it not only had videos of her Hanna with her friends, but also had videos of herself with the evil detective. The poor thumb drive didn’t have a chance in that house.
Emily is comforting Paige on the porch, when Paige decides to go inside and wash her face. Jenna proves why she is the creepiest character on the show, by appearing out of the shadows. She was about to tell Emily something about one of her friends, when she sees the two cups on the porch. So instead of giving Emily some specifics, she gives her the vague warning “Be careful who you spend time with.” The way things are set up, you are led to believe she is talking about Paige, but I think she is talking about Nate since he was the one that went all all nutso on her afterschool that day. However Paige hanging up Emily’s phone when Spencer calls without Emily’s knowledge is not helping Paige look any kind of innocent. With Pretty Little Liars, you can never take anything at face value. They live off of misdirection.
In the last scene we get confirmation of something many of us have been thinking for a long time now. There is more than one maniac running around in black gloves, and a black hoodie. ‘A’ is truly a team effort. In the scene there are two individuals decked out in “A attire” playing music on a jukebox. One set of gloves passes the motel key from the previous episode, to the other set of gloves. The song Smiling Faces by The Undisputed can be heard coming from the jukebox. Let’s applaud the musical director, for this bit of genius. Music can seriously make a scene.
Next week’s episode is “The Betrayal” and I can’t wait. From the promos it looks to be completely insane. What did you think of this week’s episode? Do you feel like you know who will be the perpetrator in the betrayal? Is Malcolm really Ezra’s son? Can Paige be trusted? WHERE IS TOBY?! Let me know what you think in the comment sections below.
Pretty Little Liars airs on ABC Family, Tuesday nights at 8pm EST (7pm CST).